This week I once again pack my bags and head off to meet up with my dear friend and mentor, Dr. Doreen Virtue www.angeltherapy.com.  As Doreen does twice a year, she will be teaching her 5-Day Angel Therapy Practitioner® course.  I’ve almost lost track, but I believe this will be my 8^th time to staff for the class. 

 

The effect that Doreen has had on my life simply cannot be overstated.  She’s changed my life on so many levels I can’t even begin to explain.  She’s also become a dear, dear friend to me.  Perhaps one of the greatest gifts she has given me is a whole new family.

 

I will also be getting to see that family next week.  We’ve been working together as Doreen’s ATP® Staff for years now but we live in places that are diverse as our personalities.  Betsy’s in Seattle.  Angie is in Kona and Chris is in California.  Noelle and Josh live in Phoenix.  Bennie and Joanie are in Texas and Mark and Tatiana are in Michigan.   And there are at least a dozen others that are spread out all over the country. 

 

I am blessed deeply to have Audra here with me in Denver to keep me steeped in my life with the Angels.  But there is something about the magic of being with the two dozen or so of us all in one place that simply cannot be duplicated.  Each person brings incredible love and meaning into my life.  And no matter how many times I am exposed to the ATP® experience, I always learn something new about myself and life in general. 

 

I have also laughed till tears streamed down my face many, many times with people like Angie, Mark, Noelle, and Josh.  There is always at least one “laughter meltdown” when we get together.  And it’s one of my favorite things about the journey. 

 

Somehow, my time with Chris is always very short, but it is precious to me.  She is one of the most amazing people I know.  And I am blessed even if I only get 15 minutes with her. 

 

Having a family like this is one of the experiences that makes life worthwhile.  So often we can allow time and circumstances to distance us from the people that give us terrific joy.  Sometimes it is difficult to find the time to take 8 days or so off to trek off to wherever in the world this Angelic family of mine is congregating in.  This trip is no exception as the timing of it is actually quite “inconvenient” for me. 

 

But as I start to pack both my business cards and my tarot cards I begin to feel the energy of this family of mine.  I think of Noelle and laugh.  I think of Chris and I know I’m going to be touched. 

 

And suddenly I realize that the only inconvenience here, is being away from these amazing people; and this amazing teacher; 49 weeks of the year. 

 

So I remind you here to cherish your family; whether born or chosen.  They define who we are. 

 

And they make life wonderful. 

Recently, I was sharing with a dear friend of mine some exciting choices that my partner Lee and I had made.  These decisions, while joyful for us, in ways cut across the grain of “conventional wisdom” and so reactions from those around us had been mixed at best.  I guess that concern for people’s reaction to our choices was also showing up in our voices so when I told my friend Jeff, his response was “I’m confused.  Am I supposed to be happy for you?  This sounds like great news but the way you tell it makes it sound like bad news.” 

Far more important than that, Jeff went on to point out to me that while we were doing a pretty good job of giving ourselves this gift completely, we really could stretch ourselves further if we wanted.  In short, he said “You’ve been given a beautiful gift.  Accept it fully in all ways.  Don’t leave any joy on the table.” 

Jeff’s words really resounded with me (he does that a lot.)  Lee and I had made a decision; we were ecstatic over it; and yet we were allowing conventional wisdom to temper our joy.   

Well, gee.  That’s pretty dumb, don’t’cha think? 

Upon further thought, it occurred to me that we as humans do this a lot.  We get told by conventional wisdom not to get too excited.  Move slow.  Be cautious (aka be afraid.)  Don’t grasp anything too quickly because well, you know “Gee-willikers you might be disappointed.”  We’re told to be realistic.  “Things never go as you think they will.” 

Talk about dream-killing talk!  No wonder most people on the planet live boring, hum-drum lives with little or no passion.  We buy into this conventional wisdom thing that nothing good lasts and everything should be tempered with pessimism and restraint.   

Valentine’s Day is a particularly big day in my family.  When you’re last name is Valentine, I’m sure you can understand why.  But I think this idea of defying conventional wisdom is particularly powerful and important at this time when we celebrate our primary relationships.  Lee and I don’t want a relationship that is chained to conventional wisdom.  We’ve been very consciously defying it whenever it suits us and especially when doing so maximizes joy.  And so far, by refuting it we seem to be living outside of its “wisdom.”   

And besides… why is it “wisdom” to temper down joy?  Whose idea was that?   

The Truth that I walked away with from my conversation with Jeff that day was this:  Take responsibility for creating the wonderful things that happen in your life.  Own that to its fullest!  Squeeze every ounce of joy out of every beautiful thing that happens to you.  Don’t ever diminish any magick or any miracle that comes your way with fear.  Caution is fine but only if joy is maintained and not fretted away by its application.   

And whenever possible, defy conventional wisdom. 

I have always been enamored by fairytales.  I believe it may be because there is generally some underdog; some misunderstood person; who is eventually seen for who they truly are.  And very often, it is the hero or heroine who finally wakes up and sees their own true value during the story. 

Some of these stories have the ability to move me more than others.  Peter Pan has always touched me.  The effect of Harry Potter; the grand fairytale of our times; upon me is so well known that people in the psychic community have nicknamed me for the boy wizard. 

But perhaps the story that pulls at me the most is Cinderella.  Here we have a story about a child that is assured by a single parent that they are valuable while the rest of the world scoffs.  The child grows up to find that she is looked over by a magickal being who transforms her world for her so that she can find her prince and (perhaps more notably) her freedom. 

Every time I encounter the story I walk away wondering where my Fairy Godmother is.  I wonder where the magick is that will transform my world for me.  I relate so powerfully to the story of magickal transformation that I cannot help but feel that something is missing that is supposed to be there.  The story of Cinderella always leaves me feeling at a loss. 

And yet when you really think it through, what did the Fairy Godmother give Cinderella?  I mean really?  Some cool clothes and a ride to the ball?  That’s the big transformation?  Cinderella didn’t get anything from her Fairy Godmother that she couldn’t have gotten from Neiman Marcus and a good cab company. 

It wasn’t a transformation so much as it was just a little push.  A nudge in the right direction. 

All three of the tales that I have mentioned have a common theme; the world is full of magick and if you can find it, it can change your life.  But maybe we are looking too hard.  Maybe we do not need fairy dust or a wand made of holly and phoenix feather, eleven inches long. 

What if all we really need to transform our lives is a little nudge in the right direction?  A little push to give us the momentum we need to move towards our own freedom and the knowledge of who we truly are.  The real magick in these stories is our heroes finding themselves.  Peter, Harry, and Cinderella all find themselves.  They know who they are whether that’s a boy who will never grow up, a wizard raised by muggles, or a scullery maid worthy of a crown.  They left behind who they were mistaken for by the rest of the world for who they knew themselves to truly be.  And in doing so came freedom. 

In doing so came their transformation. 

Magick is a part of my life and I refuse to give it up.  It wells up in me to such an extent that I have no way to deny its reality; nor do I wish to.

But maybe it’s time I started asking the Universe for a nudge instead of an incantation; a gentle push instead of fairy dust. 

Maybe it’s time I saw that little things can become big magick and the powerful transformation that I yearn for can come from simple things. 

Maybe all it takes is a trip to Neiman Marcus and good cab company.

A friend of mine recently asked me what I thought constituted a good reading.  I had mentioned to him that I had been getting several readings lately (purely for “research purposes,” of course) and I had shared with him what I thought were the good ones and the “less good” ones.  No one had ever asked me that particular question and so I gave my friend an answer as best I could with the words that just sort of fell out of my mouth.

The question has stayed with me and I’m not sure that the answer I gave him was entirely altogether accurate.

I have recently had some readings from some very gifted intuitives who were able to connect with me very accurately.  They were able to recount fairly specific information regarding timelines and changes that were going on in my life right now and do so with impressive accuracy without so much as a hint from me.  And in the moment, I called those “good readings.”  I have also had readings from those where the connection wasn’t so strong and those were “less good.”

But were they?

In reviewing my notes it has occurred to me that while one of the lovely ladies I got a reading from was astonishingly gifted at telling me what had been, and was, going on in my life right now, she really didn’t give me any information that made any difference for me.  Nothing changed in my life because I got that reading.  Nor did she really confirm the course I was on; she just told me about it.  But the connection was so clear that I felt very good about it.

On the other hand, I recently had a reading with a young man where the immediate connection did not feel as strong.  The things he said didn’t really come across as “dead on” and I left the session feeling as though the reading had been a bit lack-luster.  However in that same review of notes as the woman reader, I realized that the kid had shaken loose my way of thinking.  While the session didn’t have that intimate connection that I crave in a reading, the information he gave me showed me how I had been thinking about aspects in my life in an all-or-nothing way.  Specifically through the reading with him, I walked away realizing that I needed to make some changes.  Big ones.  I made those changes and my life is better now because of it.

So who gave me the “good” reading?

We all want our readers to establish a certain amount of credibility with us.  I don’t need the person on the other side of the phone to tell me what color my shirt is per se, but I do want to have something that tells me “they get me.”  And frankly, giving me a timeline that matches my reality of the past 60 days is a damn impressive way to do that.

But I think that we have to be careful not to get so caught up in the “magick” of the reader that we miss the whole purpose of getting a reading:  the message.

If I had it to do over again (and clearly I do) I would tell my friend that a good reading is one that helps us either confirm or change the course our life is on in order to bring us peace, joy, or both.

When I think back on it, the readings that I have given to people that I am most proud of are not the ones where I recanted for them specific details I couldn’t have known.    The readings that I am the most proud of are the one’s that made a difference for the client.  It’s the messages that I was able to deliver whereby they could make changes in their lives that really mattered that make what I do fulfilling.

Those were good readings.